Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Not a "Mommy Blogger"

    I don't mind being called a "Blogger".  And I am definitely a "Mommy".  But I've heard this term "Mommy Blogger" used too often, usually with condescension and semi loathing, (which is a shameful notation on our culture and society) and I don't identify with it.  After all, I'm not your Mommy. 

Me, being Sci-Fi Fantasy weird and charming.
     Don't get me wrong:  I love being a Mommy.  I love the three tinies who call me by that name.  When it comes out of their mouths, it is the most precious thing in the world.  But I'd like the outside world to remember that I am many things, and being a mother is just one of those.  When I began blogging, there were many good articles out there explaining what it took to be a "successful blogger".  Generally this meant finding a niche and staying there.  I thought about it.  After all, there were so many fun niches I could try to fit myself in:  Thrifter Extraordinaire, the attemptive Spiritual Guru, the passionate Injustice Monger, the sometimes weird, yet always charming Sci-fi Fantasy Writer, the ever popular and forever-damned-by-the-title Mommy Blogger...aaah, choices, choices.   But a lot of other  people are already doing these niches well.  In fact, I follow some of them myself.  I didn't think I had anything new or better to offer in those categories.  And:  A niche is limiting.  I guess that's the plain and simple truth I landed on.  I didn't want to be limited. 

  So, with a sigh over the potential success (mild sarcasm intended) I was turning my back on by ignoring such wise marketing wisdom, I decided to just blog as myself.  No pseudonyms.  No pretense on expertise.  No wild pretensions of success.   A little bit of all the categories listed in the above paragraph.  And a whole lot of imperfections thrown in.  I'm a realist:  that is, I believe in being real.  In life and in social media.  If you happen to be one of my friends on Facebook, you will never see me write (as an awesome Mommy Blogger whom I follow did recently):  "I usually wake up humming a hymn..."  Hahahaha....that one still gives me a chuckle and a shake of my head.  I love that Mommy Blogger, I really do, and I appreciate everything she shares with me via her blog, but boy-oh-boy, I do not relate with waking up singing a hymn.   

The Mommy Blogger.
In my world, waking up, means being groggily kicked awake by my 8 month old, as she searches for more space after needing to come to bed with us in the middle of the night.  Knowing the chance for more sleep has escaped me, I pull my still-tired body out of bed and trudge to the bathroom, stepping over two kids' socks and a pair of underwear that didn't quite make it into the laundry basket the night before.  I almost make it to the toilet, but my 4 year old beats me to it, deciding to use our bathroom rather than the one upstairs because he has decided to crash our bed and ask me when I'm going to make him breakfast.  There are no hymns in the mix here.  If I'm lucky to have a song in my head when I wake in the morning it will likely be the lyrics to Major Tom. 

Would I trade my morning for hers?  Not a chance.  The imperfections in mine make it beautiful.  

The "Mommy Blogger" of the Bible would be typified in Proverbs 31.  Here's this woman, smack dab in the midst of a seriously man dominated world, and she is out there doing all kinds of things.  This lady was a savvy business woman, a home-maker and a fantastic cook.  If anyone could be seen as intimidating, it would be this lady, and there are a ton of apologetic Bible studies out there to prove that she is, indeed, seen as intimidating.  She's making money on the side.  She's got her own clothing industry, she's buying land, she's got her kids and husband decked out in the finest while she's compassionately giving to the needy.  Here's one thing I'll guarantee:  If she were living in our day, she would not be putting up with the title of "Mommy Blogger". Nor would she fit in one little niche.  This gal was all over the map.  I love her freedom to do and try all these things.  I find it inspiring.  Am I intimidated by her supposed perfections?  Nope.  Just like I'm not intimidated with the Mommy Blogger who can wake up in the morning singing a hymn.  I find her inspiring.  (Not that I want to sing a hymn, necessarily, but the fact that she can wake up singing is impressive.)

Let's do that!  Let's have the freedom to try all kinds of things- don't let them put you in a niche.  Be free to be you.  And I'll be free to be me.   

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